Shoes and a Haircut

I got new shoes and a haircut and I feel pretty damn good. I feel sassy, beautiful, and special. I don’t feel guilty about it either. I don’t mind talking about it. I know that it is important for a girl to feel good about herself regardless of shape or size, and shoes (especially shoes) make me happy!

Our culture today sends many messages to girls and women: fortunately it’s shifting towards a healthy body image, no matter what that looks like. Let me tell you a little about myself- when I was in middle school I had no curves. Nothing. I used to buy men’s jeans because they were straight and fit well. When I wore a belt, it was to keep my pants from falling down because I had no hips to hold them up. Hips, waist, chest, same size. Go forward a few years, I had my first son at 19 years old. I missed the memo about not eating like a pig. I ate whatever I wanted and gained 65 pounds. I topped my hubby in weight: that was a sad, sad day. After kid two and three, I yo-yo dieted and exercised to bounce between a size 10 and 14. I still do. I learned that women are supposed to be shaped like apples, or pears. I guess I’m more of a banana or cucumber? I struggled with feeling pretty for years. I stopped caring about my clothes fitting good, and never thought about what style clothing would enhance my figure, no matter what size I was.

Self-esteem is important, and much of that is tied up in appearance, whether we like it or not. We can say that what’s important is on the inside, which is true, but I think it’s both. A girl truly feels good about herself when she knows she is awesome inside and out. About 7 years ago I had a moment where I decided I was sick of not feeling pretty. I watched 25 episodes of “What Not to Wear” and started really thinking about my appearance. I watched youtube tutorials on makeup. You might think that is really shallow- I don’t care. It changed everything for me. I found that as my outward appearance improved, my inward self became more confident. I started to enjoy shopping (usually at Goodwill and clearance racks). I started eating healthier, and regardless of my body shape or size I started feeling good about myself. Some say “it doesn’t matter what you look like”, but I would argue that it does. Outward and inward confidence are directly related. A girl who feels good about herself can be a blessing to others. Low self-esteem can lead to depression and so many other things, and is devastating for a woman. Also, when you notice a girl looks good, let her know! Compliments are wonderful!

What God says about us is clear: he created us beautiful inside and out. He designed us carefully, specifically, looks, personality, and all. Our inward self is most important. Who we are is what is important to God: his beloved children! That is not based on looks! However… In Song of Solomon, written ages ago, it was common knowledge jewelry made a girl feel more beautiful. Outward beauty was defined culturally then, as it is now. “Your cheeks are beautiful with earrings, your neck with strings of jewels. We will make you earrings of gold, studded with silver.” (Song of Solomon 1:10-11) I just love this sensual book of the Bible, how love is expressed through most beautiful language, and the desire to let a woman know how beautiful she is.

Here’s my appeal to ladies everywhere: do what you have to do to make yourself feel more beautiful. Whatever that is. It’s not about your size as much as being healthy, and how you feel about yourself. If makeup makes you feel pretty, wear it!  If no makeup makes you feel natural and beautiful, go for it! You want to rock that bikini on your vacation, do it!  If it makes you feel pretty, GO! Everyone is different, and has different ideas of beautiful. For me it’s shoes and hair. For you it might be new perfume, or a really well-fitting pair of jeans, or mascara that makes your eyes look amazing. You are worth it! Go feel good about yourself!